5

Daring Myself to Move

This is another one of my sad post.

I can never recreate the past and get the same result. That I know now. Because the people in my life now is different from before.

Regret has been eating me up that's why I've been eating a lot thus my gained weight. I guess I'm complaining about my weight because it shows that I am not really satisfied with my life. Regret is still in me.

Yes, I have my regrets. Although I've told myself that the things I've done were the right things to do during that time...but then I know I could have done more.

I know I have to forgive myself. Maybe in time. I know that to do that I have to do something big. I have to do my best. I have to accomplish something. And this is enough to stress me out.

It's hard to forgive others most of the time but it's even harder to forgive one's self.

This is the lyrics of Snow Patrol's Chocolate...

This could be the very minute
I'm aware I'm alive
All these places feel like home

With a name I'd never chosen
I can make my first steps
As a child of 25 (24...going on 25)

This is the straw, final straw in the
Roof of my mouth as I lie to you
Just because I'm sorry doesn't mean
I didn't enjoy it at the time

Goodness knows I saw it coming
Or at least I'll claim I did
But in truth I'm lost for words

What have I done it's too late for that
What have I become truth is nothing yet
A simple mistake starts the hardest time
I promise I'll do anything you ask...this time

Regret is in me.

And I also need this...

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone’s here
Everyone’s here
Everybody’s watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next
What happens next

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
Tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to moveI dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tel
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before

I just hope that I can finally forgive myself.

5 comments:

yen said...

forgiveness is really difficult to give to someone who has caused u so much pain. u know, u dont have to force urself to forgive them, it will come later.. at the right time and right place. and regret is just a waste of time. u cannot undo the past, today is what matters and the future is yet to come.

Kai said...

I know it pains to regret, but it's unhealthy, you just gotta ignore the bad feeling. I hope you feel better soon. BTW, Chocolate's one of my favorite songs. It speaks volumes, 'no? Be smiling! (:

jamie said...

everyone makes mistakes... it's part of life. sometimes we have to commit some in order to learn. just give yourself time.... time heals everything...

the past is something you have to let go of, kaya it's called "the past" what's important is the now. if you committed a few mistakes then, TODAY is your chance to redeem yourself. come to think of it, it's a challenge to be a better person than you already are...

forgiveness is hard, but it's even harder to stay angry...

smile!
xoxo, jamie

THINZ said...

smile sis! i hope you feel better about yourself.. you really gotta forgive yourself so you can move on.. take care always. *hugs*

THINZ said...

happy halloween!
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b301/kiligz/HappyHalloween.jpg
just a lil something from me…

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