Healthi-fied Jassy: 8 Votes

When I was in college, I joined a college-based organization. And I had loads of fun joining it. After a year, new sets of officers were needed and we were the next in line. And so during nominations, my friends wrote my name--out of pangttrip. They nominated me for the secretary general position and I was running against one of my block mates. I was not really expecting to win. I just did not want to have zero votes. I was not a very popular kid in school and I was running against one of the most popular girl in school. Election result came and I got 8 votes. A landslide win for my opponent. I knew where those 8 votes came from--of course from my friends--Kim, Edra, Ethel, Joret, Aliza, Shirley, and Verlein and the other vote was from me. I was touched really. That they were there for me. At least I was not humiliated. But having only 8 votes made me feel sorry for myself--at least for a while because that election proved how unpopular I was. The good thing was I was still included because I became the assistant secretary because the secgen job was really difficult. I did serve the organization but I was more of assistant vp for internals because of ethel. Hmmp! :)

I had no hard feelings against anyone. It was even one of the best moments of my college years. It was nice to be a part of something great and for me, my organization is a great organization.

But that momentary feeling of being unpopular (and hating it) came to me again brought about by the people around me these past few days. I don't exactly know why but maybe I just feel alone. And it makes me realize I am really misunderstood by most people and that the people who really knew me can be counted by at most eight or less. These past few days I think about those 8 or less people in my life. And I miss them so much. And I hope that in this lifetime, I will get to meet another 8 or less people who will really get to know and appreciate the real me.

Anyway, Gwen Stefani's 4 in the Morning is my current favorite. Too bad, that guy from the shop doesn't have that song. I like the beat and the lyrics. It makes me think why I don't really like to talk about romance these past few months. The girl in the song is obviously hurt because the guy is not giving enough for the relationship to work. She spends sleepless nights looking at the guy whom she really loves but the truth hurts. She is not really loved. The feeling of being unloved is one of the worst feelings in the world. And this feeling is kept in my brain. Loving too much is not really right for me right now. I know I've been unfair to my baby. But I know in time, I will be a better gf. I just want to think about careers and future right now. For now, I let these lines play in my head.

Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I feel alright

But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It’s all over me
I’m lying here in the dark
Watching you sleep, it hurts a lot

And all I know is
You’ve got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me
I give you everything that I am
I’m handin’ over everything that I’ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don’t ever wanna have to go and give you up
Stay up till four in the morning
And the tears are pouring
And I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we’re gonna do it, come on do it right

All I wanted was to know I’m safe
Don’t want to lose the love I’ve found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don’t let me down
It’s not fair how you are
I can’t be complete
Can you give me more?