Philippines

SONA today. I didn't listen to anything she had to say because I know that it was just full of crap.

I love the Philippines and it hurts to see it becoming worse each day.

I hope Filipinos will do something to save the Philippines, instead of just saving themselves. Because wherever you go (or migrate), you will still be a Filipino.

What about you? What can you do to save the Philippines?

So Long

I have been away pero wala pa naman akong maisulat dito. So much happened that I am slowly realizing the purpose of everything I am going through right now.

The Frog...and the Princess

...continuation:

So used-to-be frog prince went to sat by the pond one day and there he saw frogs merrily singing, hopping, and swimming. He thought, "It is nice to be a prince but I am sad. " And then as if she heard his thoughts, a female frog hopped near him, stared at him, and stayed there.

"I used to be like you, "he told the female frog, " no I'm a prince but I am lonely. I don't know what to do. My princess is waiting for me so we could finally be together. But I feel like I could not take it anymore. I wish I could swim, and hop, and sing, and play in the rain--it's lonely to be a prince."

And since he used to be a frog, when the female frog croaked in response, he understood what she was saying:

" You can always go here to be with us. I'll accompany you in your loneliness. I'll be your friend."

And they became friends. Friendship deepen and before they knew it, they have fallen for each other. One day, when the prince could not take the pain of loneliness anymore and when the frog was really attached to him, the frog told the prince, "Why don't you be with me forever? We'll play, and hop, and sing, and swim all day in the pond. It's happy to be a frog."

Then the prince kissed the frog. And he became a frog once more. (Pareho silang naging palaka!...bitter) And they lived their happily ever after.

Upon hearing the news, the princess cried and cried. She vowed never to go near a pond again in fear of meeting another frog just like the prince. She decided instead to roam the forest hoping to discover herself deeply.

Alone in the forest, she was hoping to meet someone who will love her and who will never ever leave her. She is a princess, with dreams and goals and she needs someone who will let her be her and will even follow her. Day and night she prayed. Until one day it was finally answered.

She arrived at this thick forest which seemed to be enchanted. People say that it was a nice forest but she was afraid to enter it. But out of curiosity, she went inside it. In the forest she saw an abandoned castle. It was night time and she needed a place to stay. Inside the castle, no one was around--only appliances. But out of exhaustion, she decided to stay for a while. But when she decided to finally leave, she could not leave anymore. She was stuck and later on she saw this humongous beast. She was definitely afraid. She wanted to flee but there was no way out. Because she was afraid to be devoured, she tried to study the situation and the characteristic of the beast. Day and night she also prayed. But instead of letting her escape, it seemed like the heaven was just telling her that this was another mission--tame the beast, teach him how to love. The beast used to be a prince but because he wasted his chance, he was cursed to be a beast. The only way to bring him back is to make him love sincerely. Only true love can set him free and it will also set her free. If she fails to help him then there is always the chance that she will be a beast just like him. (Horror story na ito hindi na fairy tale...hehe)

Will she succeed? She has yet to find out. Until now, the princess is still in the enchanted castle, everyday trying to help the beast. Sometimes she sees glimpse of hope that the beast can finally turn into a prince. And everyday she is also learning to stay on and try not to believe that she is doomed to be like the beast. Happily ever after doesn't only happen at the end of the story--it can happen anytime.

The End.

In every lovestory is a fairytale with a twist. Here is mine:

A long time ago in a far away land, a princess sat alone by the pond. Watching hundreds of frogs swimming along. Some of them were croaking, while others were hopping until this one frog hopped near her and stopped in front of her. She was not really afraid of the frog but she found it weird that it stood there in front of her looking at her sad eyes.

"Why are you staring at me?" she asked the frog. But it was a foolish question because frogs could not speak, they could only croak.

Ignoring the frog, she continued sitting therewallowing in self-pity, tears streaming down her face. Then suddely, to make her snap out of her thoughts, the frog croaked out loud, catching the princess attention. She saw the frog dancing (more of like hopping) and singing (croaking) desperate to make her laugh. It was successful, the princess was now interested with the frog. So from that day on, the princess went to the pond just to be near and be amazed by the frog.

Their friendship blossomed into something deeper. Although it was a frog, the princess believed in fairy godmothers and magics and that frogs can turn into a prince. Several months after, they both got the courge of revealing their feelings. And after the princess gave the frog a kiss, the frog turned into a prince. It was supposed to be a "living happily ever after" after that. But they had to part ways to make sure that they would not be living in a pond. Off they went separately--each trying to hold on to each other's love. But out of loneliness, one day, the prince went to the pond.

...to be continued

Finally...A closure

After almost 2 years of pain, anger, and regret over what i have done--finally I have my closure tonight. I keep on saying that life is okay, that I am happy. That everything is okay. I moved on. Make a life of my won. I try to reach and live my dreams. But at the back of my mind--I am still waiting for that one thing he still is not doing. Should I wait for that? Finally, the cance came but he forgot.

Being hurt can only be mend by a sincere sorry. Don't I deserve his sorry? And one disturbing dream last night is all it takes to finally have the guts to admit and tell him that he has been an asshole and he has hurt me a lot--bigtime. But not anymore. That whether I get to hear that sorry or not--I am already okay. And now I can say that I have completely moved on.

And I know that from now on--things will be better.

The risk and my angels

My brother was admitted last saturday in the hospital due to gastroenteritis. My supposed-to-be career weekend was instead spent watching him. I don't mind but then it would have been better if I could just hang out with him at home instead of him being sick. He is now better.

Him being sick paved the way for me to realize some greatt miracles and blessings in my life because Grace' Mom to chat with my Mom--we teased my brother about his "in-laws" approving of him. Anyway, in one of the topics that my mom and grace' mom talked about, mom told her that while I was still in her womb, she had an accident. She slipped and fell on her butt. She thought that I would have a cleft lip but it was a miracle or I guess I was just lucky because i looked normal. I realized that I had always been a fighter--a survivor. I guess, God loves me so much and that my angel/s is/are very much skilled--special angels because they really took care of me. But then again, maybe mom's accident caused me to be oc. But then I remembered that I recently discovered the root cause of my oc-ness. It started when I was in grade one. It was a long story but the important thing is, mom's accident did not cause that liability in me.

I guess, God really did give me special angel or angels because I would be a very stubborn kind. When I was in kindergarten, our sitter would not let me go to our store and that my younger brother was the only one she would bring, that time we lived near the public market where our store was located. it was just a 5-minute ride or a 15-minute walk. I was really begging her to take me with them I was also asking my lola's approval to let me go with the sitter. But they both refused. I was crying and mad but they just ignored me. I was I think starving that time that was why I wanted to go with them to our store because with Mom around, I know I won't starve. Minutes of crying turned into urge to go to the market. I just couldn't shake off that urge. That time, I already knew how to go to our store. But they did not know that yet. I was kinda afraid because I had to cross the street in going there. Buses still passed inside the town proper and I really did not know how to cross very busy street. I was only 5 that time. It was a miracle that by the time I was crossing the street, no vehicle or only few small vehicles were passing by. I think na there were also several adults crossing the street and I guess I crossed with them. I was wearing a bakya and my umbrella was open pa naman. Ibang trip ko talaga nung bata ako. After that I was able to go to our store--safely. Everyone was shocked to see me there. They asked me a lot of questions. Of course, I got scolded--a little but I think they were more relieved rather than mad at me. I guess, they also realized that I wouldn't get lost anymore. Mom told me not to do that craziness again. But when I was in 6th grade, I did it again. This time I was mad at her for not giving me the fare to get home. She wanted me to stay with her at the store the whole day. It was a Sunday and I just wanted to go home and rest after attending the mass. I was wearing a dress pa naman with matching ruffled socks and white shoes. From our store to our home, I walked. That time we were already living in air baser--a 15 minute ride. I thought I would walk the whole day just to reach home but I did it in 30 minutes. I was proud of myself. And once again, my parents scolded me upon learning what I did. Biro nga nila sa akin, kapag college naman daw ako, magalalakad din daw ba ako from manila to lipa. Sana hindi, naisip ko noon. It was again a miracle how no one tried to harass me while walking the busy and dangerous highway. they again told me not to do that again.

I have always been a risk-taker. Little did my parents know but I have made a lot of "craziness" in my life. I don't do bungee jumping and any other extreme sports but most of the time I am forced to live or to be in a dangerous situation. The biggest risk I did so far, was choosing to study college here in Manila. Everyday is a risk I have to make. Will I still survive the next day? What if...? And every waking day is a miracle.

Grabe, God really loves me talaga. I want to thank him for taking care of me. I also want to thank my angels kase I know that I may be unruly most of the time but still they do their best to protect me. I hope they will continue to guard me against anything or anyone that is wanting to hurt me.